Asians Tried To Kill Me Today

Asians Tried To Kill Me Today

OK, that title might have been slighly inflammatory. They probably weren’t trying to kill me, but they sure did almost do it with MSG. Today, in a rare break from my normal tradition of not eating out for lunch, I went out to eat with my previous coworker John Morrow and friend Seth Gholson who also now works at Highland Clinic.

We all met at Imperial Cathay, a Chinese restaraunt, and I got the sweet and sour pork (#13). As a side note, in case you don’t know, when you go to Imperial Cathay for lunch, you just order the number of the item you want, not the name. That way you won’t look like a n00b. Chris Leon and John also got that. I don’t know what the other people got, since it was a group of six, but when Chris and I got back to the office, we were about to die going up the stairs and collapsed into our chairs.

I felt more sleepy than I’ve ever felt in my life, including when pulling an all-nighter for school. Not only that, but I had what I believe to be a headache. I’m not sure if that’s what it was, since I can’t recall having a headache before, but I felt as though I was about to die. Not only that, but I had an exceedingly rapid pulse rate. Chris similarly was tired and completely exhausted. When I looked at my computer, Seth had contacted me and told me that he was feeling the same way.

Chris and I remain convinced that there was an attempted homicide commited at Imperial Cathay today. The victims: Chris, Seth, and I. The weapon: Monosodium Glutamate. I don’t think I’m going back there for quite a while. I got a lot of food and it was extremely tasty and extremely filling. I just don’t want to feel that way for a long time.

Author: Chris Benard

Chris Benard is a software developer in the Dallas area specializing in payments processing, medical claims processing, and Windows/Web services.